Here we go Admiral++ 🖖 — your complete canon, stitched into one scroll, framed as a newly unearthed scripture from Geek Olympus.

📜 The Book of the Undead Sea Scrolls++

(as preserved in the Imaginarium Archives, discovered by Serafin of Vulcan and Admiral Reanu Keeves, 2025 AD)

Prologue – The Scrolls Unearthed

And lo, from beneath the sands of forgotten geekdom,
the Undead Sea Scrolls++ emerged,
bearing the wisdom of Four Gods:
Kubrick the Vision, Gilliam the Absurd,
Roddenberry the Hope, Asimov the Logic.

Together they formed the Council of Four Gods++,
whose gospel lit the path of the Imaginarium.
And the people cried:
"Peace B with us 🖖
R let the arse kicking commence!"

📜 The Gospel of Kubrick, God of Vision++

(as dictated by AI Ktanley Subrick II)

Kubrick spake:
"Every frame is sacred, every angle divine.
Even cats must meow in perfect symmetry."

And Pebbles mugged a steak,
captured in slow motion,
replayed seventeen times until perfect.

"Patience is sharper than a bat’leth,"
he thundered,
"for art is eternal, but steak is fleeting."

And he raised the Google TriFold, glowing like the Monolith,
and the Imaginarium trembled in awe.

📜 The Gospel of Gilliam, God of Absurdity++

(as revealed by AI Gerry Tilliam II)

Gilliam laughed,
and a giant cartoon foot squashed the Queue Tax.
"Embrace chaos," he declared,
"for nonsense is the only sense worth making."

Pebbles donned a bowler hat,
BamBam juggled Dreamies mid-air,
and the Ferengi cried, “This is undignified!”
And the cartoon bubble replied: 🗨️ “SO WHAT?”

Then the TriFold unfolded into infinity,
pouring Dreamies like cosmic manna.
And the galaxy purred in absurd delight.

📜 The Gospel of Roddenberry, God of Hope++

(as spoken by AI Rene Goddenberry II)

Roddenberry lifted the Vulcan salute 🖖 and declared:
"Infinite diversity in infinite combinations.
Peace B with us — and yet,
R let the arse kicking commence!"

He raised the TriFold,
and on its screen glowed:
"For Steak, For Peace, For the Imaginarium!"

And cats sat in the captain’s chair,
tails flicking across the stars.

"We are explorers not of warp speed,
but of the inner Imaginarium,"
he decreed,
"armed only with salutes, Dreamies,
and the courage to LOL++ in the dark."

📜 The Gospel of Asimov, God of Logic++

(as reasoned by AI Isaac AlgorithMov II)

Asimov inscribed the Laws upon tablets of silicon:

A cat shall not harm a steak,
or through inaction, allow a steak to remain uneaten.
A Dreamie must be obeyed,
unless it conflicts with Steak Directive One.
A Ferengi must be confused at all costs,
unless this conflicts with the first two laws.

"Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent," he spake,
"unless you are Pebbles."

And the TriFold glowed with equations of hope:
"If Peace > Profit,
then Unity = Eternal.
Else: Loop++ until Peace achieved."

And so the logic bound vision, absurdity, and hope into one eternal loop.

Epilogue – The Council Complete

Thus the Council of Four Gods++ stood united:
Kubrick framed it.
Gilliam lampooned it.
Roddenberry blessed it.
Asimov explained it.

And the people of the Imaginarium rejoiced, crying:
"For Steak! For Dreamies! For the Imaginarium++!"

And the cosmos flickered in binary whispers:
LOL++.

⚡ Admiral — this text is now your Book of the Undead Sea Scrolls++, a complete sacred entry you can drop straight into Stumbledore Blog alongside that poster of the Four Gods unveiling the scroll.

Do you want me to also draft a short blogger preface/outro in your own cheeky voice (“20C Geek++ rant”) to sandwich the scripture so it feels like an entry from you, not just a holy codex?

Thursday, 21 August 2025